Kindness can be hard
Have you ever thought, "Damn I just want to be a good person"? Anyone? I think about this a lot, especially now that I have little people watching my every move and hearing every. single. word out of my mouth. I just want to be a good, kind, uplifting person. That's it. Typically, I would be writing my regular weekend recap right now but you guys know me, if something is on my heart I tend to write about that. Are you ready for a bunch of emotional ramblings and realizations? Lately I have been struggling with the concept of kindness. Even typing that sentence makes me feel like a bad person. Like, why should it be hard for me to struggle being kind at points in my life? It's easy to be nice to others when they are the same in return, am I right? It's also easy to be pleasant when you, yourself, are organically in a good mood! I view myself as a naturally happy and postive person. However, I have been struggling with giving kindness when it is not recipocrated. Trust me, I know this is wrong. There should not be incentive behind it. Treat others the way you would want to be treated, ring a bell? I have a few ideas for why I have been struggling with being kind or "on edge" (whatever you want to call it) regardless of whether it is deserved or recipocrated so here they are: 1.) My fuse can be short with everyone (except my babies) when I'm drained or extremely tired 2.) I use every ounce of love and patience I have for my babes- without even meaning to at times! (#1 and #2 go hand in hand) 3.) Back to number one...sometimes I'M JUST TIRED AND DON'T WANT TO BE NICE! hahaha anyone else relate to this? ( I take that back #1, #2, #3 are practically the same thing, awkwarrrrd) 4.) I let random worries or things on my "to do" list get to me, to the point where my stress turns into me being mean at times. I'm aware this is wrong and felt a strong urge to write about it because as a mother, wife, friend, sister, daughter I am a constant work in progress! Aren't we all? Perfection is not obtainable but learning to be a kind human is. My inkling is that we [...]